People change, don't expect me to be different in that area.
What area?
I used to be the one that didn't have that many feelings other than happiness, unless i didnt just show it, becuase thats what it comes down to.
I held it all in for too long, and now it eats its way out of me and is killing me everyday.
Secret: I have a medicine.
No, not an actual drug. Something to keep the hurt inside killing me. It's someone. Yes, someone. and i believe I've overdosed.
Two- I'm weak.
Always been, deep down inside behind that act.
Thought I was different.
All along, just like everyone else. Weak. I can't turn back. I need to know.
Know what?
How long it is really going to take me to be normal again. How long it is going to be before I completely crash down. Before I find a way to be happy again, to be free.
IM TRAPPED.
Three- I've never been the one with the happy ending.
As I sit here in sadness, drowning in my thoughts, there is no escape.
There is no escape
It's an ongoing circle
Just circluates characters.
Recycles some of the old ones, and brings new ones in.
And I suffer.
That is how it is meant to be for me.
Of course there were good moments, but they NEVER end well for me.
No happy ending=incomplete.
Always. For me.
What am I waiting for?
For that final tick to make me actually realize my addiction is not good.
Let me fall. Who cares how I fall, how I go. I need it verbadum. I need you to break me down.
Thats what Im used to.
Four- I'm only there to listen and support, only to be a freind.
Never to feel, never to be loved, never to be noticed as anything more.
That has been checked off the list a long time ago.
im ready for something new.
*Notice this post all over the place, not alligned. --this is my mind.
